Hubby and I have been talking a lot about adoption lately. Our decision to wait to save the cash to adopt internationally has given us plenty of time to stop and examine our motives for doing so in the first place. Why Africa? Why international adoption? Why a fourth child?
We both agree we want more children. We love children, we want a large family and we want to give a home to children who need one. While that may sound all nice and altruistic, it's actually much more for us than it is rescuing a "poor orphaned child." We love kiddos.
Since we can't logistically produce any more kiddos it remains to add to our family in other ways. At this point this leaves us with three options. Foster/Adopt, Domestic Newborn and International.
We have already decided that we'd like to try a different route than Domestic Newborn. Not that we had a bad experience; on the contrary, it has been amazing. But since those are the most sought-after adoptable babies we decided to go another route.
Hence the jump to international. But then we ran into the money snag. By my calculations it will take us until 2016 to scare up that kind of cash with our one-parent income. We could wait that long, but should we?
In talking about it tonight, we both agreed that in all honesty one of the reasons we wanted to do an international adoption was that it's "popular" in Christian circles. Being pretty vulnerable here... it's much cooler to adopt an African kid than an unwanted kid from down the street. Seriously. You get way more street cred in churchy circles for it, not to mention our American mentality that if it costs more, the commodity must be worth more. If an adoption costs $25,000 it must be a way better adoption than the freebie from the State.
Now, don't get me wrong here. I am totally not trashing those families out there who have adopted/are adopting internationally. Nope. I am talking about God talking to our hearts about our family. I think Jesus is a lot less interested in our churchy street cred than we are.
Don't be surprised if our plans start changing pretty soon.